previous post...continued...

I apologize for the abrupt ending to my previous post. I tend to write these while I'm working...greater inspiration of course. Because as you've read, I eat crap at work.

Anyway -- I believe I was just finishing explaining why I haven't, for two months now, lost any weight. BUT, I have a great feeling the tides will soon turn. I joined a site .. a website. A good friend of mine recommended Spark People, so far, seems amazing. I have yet to completely explore everything the site has to offer, but it seems very promising! Here are the basics...

1. Counting your calories
2. Tracking your nutrition habits
3. Tracking your fitness
4. Tracking your weight loss
5. Joining groups comprised of others just like you - with similar goals
6. Access to thousands upon thousands of informational/motivational articles
7. Maps out PRECISELY (breakfast, lunch, dinner and snack) what you should eat on any given day (if you choose to follow what they suggest)
8. Offers tutorials on exercises that work every inch of your body

Like I said earlier, there is so much more than what I listed! It's great! I really didn't think counting calories would be so easy! It does even more than that. It maps out (via pie graph - I LOVE pie graphs) the percentages of your diet in regards to the specific food groups and suggests what you should be eating more or less of. I started this last week. Although the site allows you to much more easily keep track of your diet, you still need to go to the gym! And going to the gym is something that I have had QUITE a big of trouble doing the past few weeks. I've been very very very very bad. It has just been very very very very very hard with my work schedule recently. From now on, I thought I would try writing down which days and times I will go to the gym. This week - I'm going to go every day but one!

I really do think Spark People is going to help, and I recommend everyone at least take a quick look!

Until next time... ''Early to bed, early to rise, makes a man healthy, wealth and wise.''

I has dat spark!

Ladies and gentleman, I DO apologize. It's been quite sometime. I have news! Hold onto your hats..........................

....................... I have yet to lose weight! HAHAHA. Actually...that's not funny. I'm pretty upset about it. Let me list some of the reasons why I think this whole weight loss thing might not be working for me.

I haven't been to the gym in two weeks. When I visited Chris on Valentine's weekend...together, we drank a total of one handle of Captain Morgan and nearly 48 beers and last - but not least - I haven't been eating very healthy.

I do see light at the end of the tunnel, however. I've been losing body fat! :) My number so far are listed below:

weight body fat weight lost
157.8 36.9
155.6 36.9 -2.20
158 36.7 2.40
160 37.6 2.00
158.6 37.2 -1.40
159.2 37.9 0.60
159.4 37 0.20

I remember in a previous post I mentioned to you that I was going to try a weight loss supplement. Well, I did. And obviously, it did not work. There were a few days which I did not take the pills the exact way I was supposed to, but should that matter? If you're taking a laxative...you should poop. Bottom line. I don't care if I took three fiber pills in stead of four in the morning. I took three massive laxative pills every night and not much happened! It was very upsetting. Good for Chris, upsetting for me. Not only that...but the amount of fiber I was taking combined with the amount of water I was drinking -- that alone should have made me poop. But no, it did not. It really just gave me a few (minor) headaches each day. Any normal person...

I will complete this post later. I am at work. And of course, there has been a school shooting. Where else other than right next door to Columbine High School.

don't worry...

I haven't forgotten! I've been very very busy. I promise, I will post tomorrow! I have some new (rather juicy) info. And no...I'm not talking about what happens when you use a cleansing supplement.

another weigh in...another pound...or two.

I know it's been quite some time since my last legitimate post, but I've been very busy! Well...not too busy...but it's not always easy to get my buttox off the chair and away from the TV!

You may all be wondering why I apologized to Chris and Jess in my last post. Well, here it is. I believe it was Christmas Day that we decided to start this competition. Chris and Jess did anyway, before I so rudely invited myself into it. The NEXT day, we made the trek to Connecticut to his Omi's* house. We literally went over the river and through the woods to get there. How funny, right? No? OK. Anyway...Jess, Chris and I were sitting in the back seat of his Susan's Prius. Saying it was crowded would be an understatement. We all vowed that the next time we had to make that trip to Omi's, it would be significantly comfortable!!! Why did I apologize, you say?

BECAUSE I CAN'T STOP GAINING WEIGHT! WHYYYYYY?!

Oh wait. I know why! Maybe it was the 9 packets of Fun Dip* I ate this past weekend. OR MAYBE it was the McDonald's I ate on the trip down to Virginia. Or the plate of taquitos? Or the bag of chips? Or the Chinese* food? Or the second bag of chips? Maybe the granola bars or sour patch kids! Or the beer and hard liquor! Wait wait wait...my mistake...it was DEFINITELY the buffet*.

Luckily I passed out just in time the second night to miss pigs in a blanket.

I'm sure ya'll are curious what I weighed in at this week. Four weeks into the competition and I weigh 160 pounds. I promise you...for all my millions of readers who don't actually know me...I don't look 160 pounds. I do have quite a bit of muscle. And as we all know...muscle weighs more than fat. With that said...Jess is continuing to lose weight (and at her expense, but also to help make myself feel better...it's a tiny amount each time...sorry Jess...I feel better now). Chris gained weight, but still weighs less than he did at the start. I wish I can say the same.

Here's my concern though, and maybe someone can help me understand this. I feel like I LOOK skinnier! I know I'm going to be BOMBARDED* with comments about how I'm gaining muscle and burning fat, which is fine. But to that, I say, WHY IS MY BODY FAT PERCENTAGE NOT GOING DOWN?! I can see my knees! I really can. Over Christmas I could only see my knees defined when they were bent, but NOW my knees are JUST knees...not a a layer of flab covering my knees. So I'm gaining weight, not losing body fat and I can see my knees? I know you might be thinking, ''If you're looking skinnier, then why do you care?" Well, I care because this is still a competition!

Two more things:

1. I've started my supplement. I was going to wait for after I see Chris the next few weeks, but I was so mad at the scale Tuesday morning I reacted. By the time I regretted it I was already 4 fiber capsules deep. There's no going back. (No change yet, but I'm sure there will be soon)

2. I've decided I don't deserve to have a picture of healthy food as my banner under the title of my blog, so I decided to change it to something more appropriate. Until I weight 150 pounds, it will remain pictures of fat things.

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Omi: German word for grandma! ...and she's a kick ass one at that.
Fun Dip: I'm sure you all remember it. Don't tell me you haven't purchased it from the creepy trailer selling goodies at little league games.
Chinese: Do I capitilize this when referring to food? I think so....
Buffet: Golden Corrale -- an awesome place where employees make fun of you when you don't know what you're doing. I'm sorry Virginia, but people up north don't visit fast food buffets as often as you do.
bombarded: When I refer to things like being ''bombarded'' with comments or my ''millions'' of readers, I hope you realize I'm being sarcastic. However, I DOOO appreciate the six followers I have, three of which I know are pretty devoted (Jess, Jess P. and Chris) and Jess, who always comments :)

sorry Jess and Chris...

...but the ride to Omi's on Saturday won't be any more comfortable than last time.

I'll explain to everyone later WHEN I GET BACK FROM THE GYM (in a few days). Not really...but seriously...it'll be a while.

Excuse me, I have to use the restroom....

This is going to be short. I'm just THAT ashamed.

I gained 2.40 pounds. That means I weigh .20 lbs more than I did at our initial weigh in.

I'm now losing.

In other news - I've taken drastic measures. Not THAT drastic, but something new. I'm trying a cleansing supplement. I have been thinking about trying one for a while now, but never really had the guts. I was able to score a free two week supplement from a co-worker, who also said it worked great for her and a friend. Like anything else...there are good reviews and there are bad reviews. I've done my research. It's one of the safest and I thought I'd give it a shot. I'm not entirely sure when to start taking it, because I plan on camping out by the bathroom for the two weeks I am. It'll be hard -- especially since it's hard to leave the desk at work, but I'll deal. One thing is for sure, I'll start it AFTER my visit to Chris on Valentine's Day weekend. That's the plan at least. Who knows...maybe I'll get desparate and start before (not that it matters -- Chris loves me enough to deal with whatever 'side effects' a supplement may have -- hahaha right hun?)

Now, before ya'll smother me with comments telling me 'it's unsafe!' and 'don't do it!' -- listen. If for one minute I think this may turn ugly - if for one minute it makes me feel ill - if for ONE SECOND I think I may be visiting the bathroom too much for my own good, I'll STOP.

One thing is for sure -- it should make for some interesting blog material!

I have a bad feeling...

...about tomorrow's weigh in.

Let's quickly run through the list of reasons why.

1. I went food shopping last week and bought basically 4 different types of bread and chicken.
2. I fried the chicken.
3. I ate all three (rather thick) pieces of chicken in two days.
4. I went to the gym twice since last week's weigh in.
5. I stayed less than an hour each time.
6. I cooked the second pack of chicken breasts today.
7. I fried it.
8. I ate it for dinner 10 minutes ago.
9. Yesterday I cooked two pounds of bow tie pasta with a wine and cheese sauce.
--Healthy decision #1: I put frozen peas in the dish.
10. I ate the dish when I made it, last night at work and when I got home for lunch.
11. I still have a pound left.
12. I feel disgusting.
13. When I weighed myself a few days ago, I was already back up to my original weight.
14. I've only gained weight since then.
15. Reason why next week's weigh in isn't going to go so well either -- I'm visiting Virginia this weekend. That means -- No gym. No healthy food. TV. Video games. Beer.

I'd love to sit here and bore you with all the ridiculous decisions I've made this week in terms of my diet, but my fingers would start hurting. I'm ACTUALLY concerned for myself. I have the self dicipline to make it to the gym, I do. But there is no way I can stop eating the foods I love. A colleague of mine tells me to eat salad and healthy cereal alone. Cereal I can do. Salad I do all the time (my mom is a health nut). But ONLY cereal and salad? NO! I think if I continue to eat the way I do..I'll just have to go the gym 7 days a week (yeah -- like that will happen). At least I'm not alone.

Chris lost a whopping 1.8 lbs last week, and Jess...well Jess gained weight.

That puts me in the lead! I lost a total of 2.2 lbs last week. :) Like I said...I'm having a bad feeling about tomorrow.

I got a feelin' ... woooo hooooo ... that I gained all my weight back this week! that I gained all my weight back this week! that I gained all my weight back this weeeeek. Tonight's the night. I fudged up. I got my chicken. Let's fry it up! I'm really lazy. Like oh my god. Get on that sofa. Nev-er get, UP!*

By the way...READ THIS ARTICLE! Headline: Floor collapses at Weight Watchers meeting


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Lyrics*: My pathetic attempt at humor. Yet -- exactly how I feel.